Hap-happy new year everyone!
And thanks for all the comments on the previous post.
I'm not going to apologize for the rant, but I will apologize for the self-indulgence (normally I'm such a happy, if loquatious, drunk). But what's life without a few psychological hangups, eh?
And really, I do like pink. I've yet to meet a color I didn't like. Oh, I've got the usual hues I gravitate to EVERY TIME (mmm, scarlet), but, for example, I'll start knitting something in a gorgeous, delicate pink and suddenly I swoon. It's immediately the Best Color In The Universe and what have I been thinking, not noticing it for this long? I have my little color flings.
Maybe it's all the playing with patchwork for the quilting - there's no colors I don't like. Just color combinations. So pink? Beautiful. I just have some problems with some of the societal connotations.
We've been travelling all over the place and it's been trains, planes, and automobiles and The Party Never Ends (WOO WOO) what with Xmess and my birthday and New Year's. And while I'm kind of relieved to be back home again, I sort of miss all the excitement. I've been trying to figure out why I so enjoyed the holidays, and besides not having to work, I think the primary reasons are:
a) I got to be around a lot of people
b) I wasn't constantly worrying
Not much I can do about not having to work all the time. However:
A is my own fault. I don't really, um, get out much. Like, not at all. This is something I can do something about. Time to try another stitch 'n' bitch group . The first didn't go so well but I need to be tougher-skinned about this all. The right group's out there but it ain't happening while I sit all mopey at home.
Now B. Worry worry worry, it's like a pastime of mine. As if I'm constantly honing my mad worrying skillz.
It's time to stop living my life in regret. No more worrying about things I cannot change. Make an action, carry something out, decide or decide not to, but DECIDE. I'm tired of second-guessing everything and trying to be perfect the first time. Time to shoot that inner perfectionist and learn from mistakes, not be consumed by them. Regrets should only serve as constructive criticism so that I DON'T DO THAT STUPID THING AGAIN.
And in the spirit of all that wonderful holiday human interaction, I thought I'd actually join a couple 'alongs. I don't normally, seeing as how if I don't participate, I won't disappoint anyone. But these are all self-affecting, and nobody's gonna feel too sad if I don't quite make it all through the stash-along.
Hello, the stash? Out of control. Literally. It embarasses me everytime I see bits of it. I have PLENTY of FANTASTIC yarn and there is no excuse, none, why I shoudn't be using it. I have a wee bit of the obsessive-compulsive in me and definitely Collector tendencies. And it's one of my slowly-working-towards Life Goals to be more of a Doer and less a Collector. Let's take the weight off and fucking knit something for once.
And speaking of taking the weight off.
I never make any time-dependent weight goals, because they inevitably depress instead of inspire me. HOWEVER, I am joining Rachael's 100 miles by April 1st because I need all the inspiration I can get when it comes to getting to the gym in the dark cold mornings of the winters.
I will be elliptical-trainer-ing and walking my way to 100 miles, due to the crappy knees and my wish to still be using the original equipment when I'm 40. I would really like to feel more comfortable in my body and my clothes. This is one place where regrets are perhaps helpful.